⚠ PODI DOES NOT GUARANTEE A RESPONSE. OR OUR EXISTENCE. ⚠

Get in Touch (If You Dare)

We're notoriously hard to reach. This is by design — it's harder to sue someone you can't find.

⚠ ATTENTION: If you are contacting us regarding a legal matter, a safety concern, a refund request, a missing person, or "what were you thinking," please be advised that PODI operates under the legal principle of "we'll get back to you" (which means we won't).

📍 Location

PODI Headquarters
1234 Marina Boulevard, Unit B
("Behind the dumpster, next to the bait shop")
Miami, FL 33101

Note: We're never actually at this address. We work from a van. It's down by the river.

📞 Contact Info

Phone: (305) 555-PODI

(This number goes to a disconnected line. We think it adds character.)

Email: info@podidiving.com

(We check this once a month. If it's full, we delete everything and start over.)

Emergency: Call 911, then call us. Actually, just call 911.

📝 Send Us a Message

(We probably won't read it, but it's therapeutic for you)

By clicking "Send Into the Void," you agree to receive exactly zero replies. Your information may be sold to third parties, posted on our Instagram, or lost forever. We are not responsible for any data breaches, which is convenient because we also don't protect your data.

⏰ Office Hours

MondayClosed (hangover)
TuesdayClosed (recovery)
Wednesday11:00 AM - 2:00 PM (maybe)
ThursdayBy appointment (Chad's parole)
FridayHappy Hour Only
SaturdayIf we feel like it
SundayClosed (hungover again)

🌐 Follow Us

Instagram: @PODI_Diving

(47% selfies, 30% blurry fish photos, 23% complaints about other dive agencies)

TikTok: @PODI_Danger_Divers

(Content includes near-misses, equipment failures, and Chad doing stupid things)

YouTube: PODI Diving Channel

(3 subscribers, all of us)

🚩 Reasons You Might Be Trying to Contact Us